Pregnancy #2 at 38 weeks

I feel SO over being pregnant. If you are facebook friends with me...I'm sure you are tired of hearing just how over it I am.

Yes, I am still anti-induction and still plan to have the baby whenever he wants to come out....but more so than with my first pregnancy, I am beyond done.

Baby boy has {currently} 33 of some unit of amniotic fluid. The normal range is 8-25, with 21-25 being on the high/tad bit concerning side. His number two weeks ago was 26, and one week ago was 24.5. I asked my midwife how "off" these numbers can be, since 26 to 33 over 2 weeks is such a huge jump. She said, in general the lower numbers might have been off, based on his position, but if the ultrasound tech is seeing 33 now...that's "fairly" reliable. (the more likely scenario is that he's created more fluid over time) One-er-full. {sarcastically spoken, wonderful}

He is also on the super chunk side...and if I haven't had him by next Tuesday, I'll have a better "estimate" of his weight for you--as we are scheduled for a bio physical profile (aka BPP) on 12/18. Increased fluid does make for some really neat sonograph photos, though, if there is a "bright" side.

I am so heavy and ginormous in the front. Last week my sister (among others), said that you can't really tell I'm pregnant from the back, but the side and front are like VAVAVOOM. I'd say that's an accurate statement. I've gained 50 pounds (+counting?) with this pregnancy!! I gained about 45 with G, and I was much more puffy/over all bigger with her.

I do not sleep well at all...not that I did with G's pregnancy either, but lack of sleep has taken on a new meaning. With G, it was more insomnia; whereas now I am straight up exhausted and tired, but too ginormous to get comfortable in any position. I've possibly cried about it at night. Part of the time I try to sit on the birth ball (re: big exercise ball), leaning over the bed, with my head on some pillows. It's the most comfortable position I can figure out, but I'm too scared I'll fall over/off the ball, that I get light sleep at best. I'd say I get about 4 hours of sleep, broken up into small fragments. Having a newborn will mean more sleep for me, not less. So there's another bright side.

I've been having regular contractions for a week. So that's fun. I wasn't dilated any last Tuesday, but didn't have my midwife check today because even if there was progress, it doesn't mean much. With G, the hardest part of my labor was getting to a 2 or 3, and after that I focused internally and survived through an extremely hard posterior labor. Therefore, I really doubt I am dilated any now...despite the week of discomfort, cramping, and contractions.

notice his smushy nose and uber chin rolls!

My best guess is that until my water breaks (and there will be a huge amount), labor won't move forward that much, or be too painful. But after that glorious event, I imagine labor will be hellacious for about 2 hours, then he'll be here. One can hope.

I pray he stays healthy through everything, and that I survive too. Death is a lot bigger fear than it was last time. I know that's not very positive, and I try to push it out of my head, but I am truly concerned that something bad will happen. Down Syndrome is honestly looking pretty good among my other fears.

I hope today is his birthday so that I can find some peace, comfort, and kiss his super chubby cheeks.

Love to all.