new name

maybe you noticed that I let lettersfrommomma.com expire?
Sad day, right?

Meh... I was never posting anyways! I guess it makes things harder to find now though, whoops.

I'm wanting to shift things over to more baking and parties and eating clean and life stuff anyways.

So I'm thinking Clean Kaylene :-)

I'll keep you posted.


maybe!

On mothering two, versus one...or, Lessons I've Learned

I've found myself sounding like a broken record, of late. I'm pretty sure if we are friends IRL (you know, in-real-life), you've heard either A. about my birth opinions/J's story (which we don't need to rehash on the blog) &/or B. how I feel about the differences between having 1 & 2 kids. 

So here we go.... Kaylene's great insight into motherhood...which is what this blog is about anyways...and it's so funny to look back on old posts--if you're new here, hopefully you read this one before all the old ones...because I'm a lot less neurotic now. Well, sometimes.

You can not teach a woman how to be a mom. Trust me, I have BTTT (been there tried that, for those less acronymly inclined). While pregnant with G, I wanted to know how to be a mom, so I talked to moms around me, I read articles about being a mom, I read books (I read two books. really!), and I read TONS-literally hundreds-of mom message boards/forums about a plethora of topics. It.did.not.matter.
Maybe you've heard, "there's nothing you can do to really prepare you for that first night with your baby." I would argue that's not really true. You can do a lot to prepare...but that's totally different from actually getting your hands dirty. You can't teach that. True motherhood is something you have to experience on your own--to really figure out how to be a mother--because it looks different for all of us. Maybe someone told me that, it certainly didn't register though. I really wanted someone to tell me how to be good at mothering. I thought if only someone would tell me what to do, I would do it, and do it well, and then I'd be on my merry way to find the next task at which to excel.
You see, that's how I am. I get a goal, or a responsibility, and I work super hard to knock their socks off. Who is this someone, this their, this they, this them?? "They" are made up in my head, perhaps your head too.

Being a mother is not a goal, or a responsibility. It's a life path that is simply about the journey. There is never an end...well, there is, but it's pretty finite and let's not think about that, mkay?
There is no 'next task,' so don't look at it as something to be good at and move on, look at it as a daily way of life...caring for your babies. What ever that looks like for you, rock it, but know that there's no one who will come give you a gold star or A+. Do what you do, and do it so that YOU can sleep at night. That is, if your babies will let you. It was never about having the best kid, I just wanted to do the 'right' things for her...but thankfully I've learned that to be the best mom, I have to stop trying to reach the finish line. If I would have started this motherhood thing like I did my marriage, I would have been a lot better off. I look at my marriage like a path to stroll down together, and that's what being a mother is like too. My kids and I, taking this awesome walk. Together.

Being a mom of one, I was a total ball of nerves. I don't know why. And I was totally oblivious to it. People around me knew it, because they even TOLD me I was....but I deflected, because I honestly didn't think I was. I really was just trying to find my way. And that's how we ALL are. There are the natural-mothering-types, to whom being a mother comes naturally, and I actually think I am one of those women, but I had to relax for that to really show. I have a super type-A personality, but children--especially close in age--force you to let go on somethings...or at least they do if you want to have a happy life. So having #2 only 22 months after #1 was exactly what God had planned for my life. My natural mothering instincts were getting overridden by my forceful personality, and having baby J was a much-needed reset.

With G I wanted to control everything...I mean, I did and I didn't. I knew that  I had to let her "be", but...you guys have read my blog (or most of you have anyways) or remember me with her, and I was pretty anal about things, especially her sleep. With J, I wouldn't say I'm completely non-anal, I just know how to manage his sleep schedule without letting it consume my life. And I know that I don't give birth to children who like to sleep...so I gave up trying to force it. I actually gave up trying to force a lot of things. I don't get nearly as flustered as I used to. This too shall pass. Keep that on repeat in your head (that is, if you are looking for advice).

When you only have one baby, there's a LOT of time to think about how you are screwing them up, how you can do it better, and how other people are doing it better (or worse). When you have two (or more), there's substantially less time to do that...so you are lucky because your life is fuller and more complete with real-life activities. This is not to say those with only one child have an incomplete life, I'm simply saying there's more time to obsess.

As you recall, this blog used to be a lot more active. I had my reviews to give me something to do and feel productive (or over-stretched!), I wrote about my opinions on mothering (many of which I still believe in, but don't obsess over), and I shared miniscule details of my adorable baby girl's life (that are fun to go back and read, but also aren't all that noteworthy). But then baby J happened. and I got busy living life. THE LIFE. The one I thought having kids would be all about. Ladies and Gents, we have arrived. Come visit our house and you will find a real family lives here. Not one trying to maintain some TV show pedestal, or some parenting book model.

When I only had one baby, I thought...man this is so hard...how could I do it with more? How do bigger families manage? I may only have two now, but I totally know....they let the little things slide. They roll with the tides.

I have learned that it is okay if J chews on a toy that isn't specifically a "chew toy" (I mean, as long as it's not digestible-like paper-, or covered in dirt or something, it's fine, right?). I've learned it's okay that he's army crawling on the kitchen floor, even if it's been more than a day since I last mopped it (oh the travesty!). I've learned that even though he's "supposed" to take two naps today, it's okay if I pushed him off a little bit so that he takes one (fingers crossed) longer, better-suited-to-my-schedule, nap while G naps too. It's okay if I reuse a bib from breakfast at lunch (so long as it's not gross, I mean, I do still have my above-average clean standards). I've learned that he can slobber on his clothes a little bit and not have to change it right away (type A is something I'll never be able to get away from). I've learned that he can cry, or whine, or fuss, way more than I ever let G...and I thought I let her do that a lot...haha--nope.

My favorite thing I've learned? I can take two crazy kids to the store, with hardly anything, and be totally fine. I do not need to pack for deathcon5. I can take them to the park, J in the Beco and still be able to lift G up into the swing. I can take them grocery shopping, while one attempts to jump to his death from the cart-seat, and the other zoom-zooms her way around with the kid-cart, oblivious to the can of beans she just knocked over (actually, I added that for dramatic effect, G has the keenest attention to detail ever). I am, in fact, super woman, and haven't you heard--I'm freaking awesome at this mothering thing. If you don't think so, there's the door...because you know what? I think you're freaking awesome at this mothering thing too.

Recently, rather, constantly, we hear about this "mommy war" shiz...or parental-judgement...or whatevs.
I think it's a crock, and apparently a lot of you do too, because a big parent magazine did a nationwide survey and found that while parents believe the mommy-war exists, they don't feel it in their day-to-day life. And I couldn't agree more. I really think that social media, the internet, and news articles perpetuate this balloon of judgement. There is, as I've always maintained, a parent-information-overload. I don't interact with women who judge me, and I don't judge them. Sure we do things differently, and maybe I don't agree with everything they do...but I don't sit there and tell them they shouldn't do it that way.... I don't have their kid, or their life, and how could I possibly presume to know what they should do? I think tons of moms feel this way, and that's why this whole mommy-judgement thing is a crock. Sure there are a lot of people out there judging other people, there always have been and there always will, but as with anything--get away from them. And take it from me.....life is not all about the type of mother you are...life is about the little people that made you mothers to begin with. Take a deep breath, remember this could all be gone in an instant, and live a little.

As I say to my husband...."We've gotta live OUR life, ya know?"

We have tons of fun. Learning happens through play, real-world activities like errand running or play dates, and being a stay at home mom really allows me to foster an environment of success for our kids. We are truly blessed and judgement has no place in our life. I'm so much more relaxed as a parent and person. I credit my husband for being the ying to my yang, and I credit my kids for reminding me just how awesome the tickle monster is. We love hanging out with other families or couples, because we hope to be a good example of balance as a Catholic Family.

To Do List + taking suggestions

Find an infant car seat that fits our budget (less that $150) but is also very safe (cute doesn't hurt).
Find a double stroller that has the capability to have a car seat clipped in (jogging style preferred).
Find either a big girl bed for G or a new crib for baby boy.
Find a new OB doctor and baby boy / G new doctors, OR move back to our old town :-)
Figure out where to give birth...home's not really an option.
Drink more water and eat lots of protein.
Buy & wrap Christmas presents in advance.
Take a fall trip to the Midwest if we don't get the okay to move back asap.

I've got a lot spinning around my head right now, but I promise to get back in the regularity of posting :-) My sister was here for a week, so that is why things slowed down even more!

Letters from Momma's Momma (a guest post by my mom)

While my parents were here, my dad thought it would be fun to write a blog post for me...He just had a lot of random thoughts he wanted to talk about and thought it'd 'help me out' if he did a guest blog since I took so much time away from the computer to be with them. Well, he never ended up writing for me (you still can, dad!)--but it did motivate my mom to write one! She shares her thoughts on visiting us for so long, and being a grandma for the first time. I appreciate her sincerity and ability to share her feelings with me and my readers! I hope that you all enjoy reading what my mom has to say.

Question for the other moms out there to ponder---Have you ever wondered how hard it must be for your mom to get used to you being a mom yourself?? Of course they love having grandkids, but I imagine it must be a very strange feeling when it first happens...to see the one you parented become a parent herself!

---

Guest Post: Keeping Baby Healthy

Today I am sharing a guest post from Katie Moore, who blogs at Moore from Katie about motherhood. May was pregnancy awareness month and she asked to write a post for Letters from Momma. Due to the craziness in my life right now (mostly a pregnancy and two week visit from my mom), I scheduled her post for while we were at Yosemite. I hope you all enjoy it and check out her blog! Thanks for sharing Katie!

---

Keeping Baby Healthy

Newborns are precious gifts, but they can also be somewhat fragile. A newborn is generally much more susceptible to colds and other sicknesses, and these ailments are usually more serious with a newborn baby than they are with adults. For these reasons, it's important to take steps to help protect a new baby during the important first months of life. It's not impossible to keep a new baby healthy, but it does require a bit of care.

When God Knows Best...We're Expecting!

G will be getting a little brother or sister for Christmas this year! They will be 22 months apart, which is a bit closer than I'd prefer, but it's really something God had his hand in.

The long and short of it is that this baby was neither planned nor unplanned. We left it up to God and we couldn't be more excited now. We'd like 3 kids and are glad to be young parents. G loves babies and other kids, I know she will be a great big sister. She's nearly weaned (just went down to 1 feeding--before bed--today) and will probably be potty trained by the end of the summer. She really doesn't seem like a baby at all. Her lack of real-word-talking is really the only thing that reminds us just how young she is at 15 months.

{My 20th} Seven Quick Takes

--- 1 ---

This time next week, we will be in Kansas City! It's just a short trip back required by my husband's job, but G and I are tagging along (at our cost) to visit some friends and spend extra time with daddy. He doesn't have anything to do on Friday, so we are hoping the weather allows us to go to some outdoor attractions we never saw when we lived there. We have direct flights both going and coming, but that doesn't make flying with a baby easy, so I'm crossing my fingers for the least amount of stress possible. I'm really excited to see loved ones we haven't seen in nearly 2 months, and the comfort of the midwest has been calling my name since we left. EXCITED!

--- 2 ---

Guess who's been sick this week? Yup, the poor baby girl. We had a short play date at a park last Friday, and the little boy we met there had a runny nose. Apparently it leached onto G and she's been fighting some kind of respiratory illness since Sunday. She spiked a fever Wednesday evening but it's been low enough not to warrant medicine or a call to the doctor. Hopefully she kicks it before the beautiful weekend we are supposed to have.

January 2012

Monday night I told my husband, "I can't believe tomorrow is the last day of January." He said, "What?? Where did the time go? This month went too fast....this year is going fast...last year went fast...."

He's not usually the dramatic type, so his comments struck me by surprise. Yes, January did go fast...but since having baby G, the time does seem to fly by. I think it is because we find ourselves in this cycle of grinding out the days just to make it to the weekend, which then is over too soon. If only we could live a life of weekends. Wouldn't that be so lovely?

The weekends are such a magical time. Fun things happen on the weekends.

Seven Quick Takes Friday

--- 1 ---

I'll start with a prayer that is from yesterday's Small Steps for Catholic Moms page.

Don't let me look down, Lord, when I carry the cross you've chosen for me. Let me look up and whistle while I work!

---So HARD sometimes, but exactly what we need to do (especially me).

--- 2 ---

G is starting to look like a "big girl," despite not yet walking. I know everyone says that now is the time she begins to move from baby to toddler. Apparently, eleven to fifteen months is the "time of maturity." I guess after that she'll be a real toddler. It's crazy to me that I have such an old baby. Most days, I feel like I should still be toting around a baby who sleeps 75% of the time, nurses every 2 hours, and isn't mobile. I wonder if she will be eternally three months old in my mind?

Check out my post this week, with all of the fun 11 month old things G does!

--- 3 ---

Naturally, I have to share this too cute picture of baby G.

just love her toothy grin!

Guest Blog at The Cloth Diaper Whisperer

My most recent submission to The Cloth Diaper Whisperer was posted yesterday. I have been taking a blog-break for my husband's birthday but had to pop on here to pick a new winner for the Bummas giveaway...and saw my blog had posted over there!

I hope you'll check it out! It's about traveling with cloth diapers.

Weaning to Cloth Completely

If you're visiting from the CDW, I hope you'll stick around :-)

I often have cloth related giveaways (a swaddlebees wipe one is coming up soon!); I blog about cloth diapers and other kinda crunchy parenting topics!

Social Networking to be Healthy - Café Well

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Cafe Well for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.
Cafe Well is a relatively new social networking site that aims to keep you focused on your health. It brands itself as "The Social Network to Get Well and Stay Well," so it's perfect for anyone looking to get healthier in the new year, as well as those wanting to stay in tip-top shape.

Rather than using other popular social network sites to share health-related ideas, goals, or challenges; you can find a niche for healthy living at Cafe Well. I know many of you have made a status or tweet about your latest attempt to lose weight, run a 5K, or make a healthier dinner for your family.... so just take those ideas over to Cafe Well, where you can find like-minded people 24/7. Share your ups and downs with getting in shape, training for a marathon, aiming to drink more water each day, or simply maintaining your weight.

Apple iPad 2 & Kindle Fire #Giveaway

Rafflecopter is available for everyone to use! Previously, you had to receive an invite to host a giveaway using Rafflecopter....but no longer! They've left beta and gone public.

To celebrate, the giveaway application is hosting a giveaway!

Enter below, and be sure to say that *I* Kaylene Brown referred you!

It's so easy to do you should ALL enter! Even you Dad ;-)


a Rafflecopter giveaway



Now, go get Rafflecopter to use on your blog for giveaways!

My vocation as a wife {guest post}

Today I have another guest post to share with you! I am featured at Day in the Life.

Emily was looking for bloggers to write about their vocation as a wife, and, of course, I jumped at the opportunity to write about my favorite thing ever.... being my husband's wife.

Check it out:
Evolution of my vocation as a wife

What'd you think??

Baby on a Budget, guest post

Today I have a guest post at Catholic Newlywed. I wrote an intimate piece about having a baby on a budget.

I'd love to hear what you think, either comments here or there.

Baby on a Budget: Happily a One Income Family

Hope you enjoy reading, because I really enjoyed writing it!

December 2011 Statistics

Is it really January?? December is my favorite month of the year, and I can't believe it's over. It was a really full month for my family, birthdays, holidays, travel, etc... I'm surprised I kept up with the blog like I did. I think my biggest flaw is dedication. It's a double edged sword because it's good because people can rely on me, but it's bad because sometimes I can go overboard and other things get pushed to the side. When I commit to something, I go all out...but last month I started feeling like my personal life has taken a back burner to Letters from Momma. I am not okay with that. Yes, I enjoy blogging--I like bringing you information about cloth diapers, recipes and meal plans, parenting opinions, and great giveaways--but not at the expense of my sanity and quality time with my family. That's why I took a few days off around Christmas, and I have been less rigid about my posting schedule. Hopefully you agree this is a positive move. I don't know how "huge" mommy bloggers do it...do they ever sleep?

Anyways, here are last month's stats:

New Years Resolutions

Happy New Year to you all!!

I hope that 2012 is a blessed and prosperous year for all of my family, friends, and readers.

Letters from Momma is sure to have a great year, and I have several professional goals for the blog.

For now, here are my personal new year resolutions.

1. Read my Small Steps for Catholic Moms book. My friend gave it to me for Christmas. I'm really excited about it.
2. Run a 10K or half-marathon by May. If the entry fees are too much, I'll probably just map out a course and have my husband time me... definitely not the same as a race, but I can't justify paying an arm and a leg to go run.
3. Continue meal planning, and keep our food budget less than $350 a month.

Cloth Diaper Review Opportunity

Kebbie's Diaper Bag is looking for cloth diaper bloggers to test out their products.

I hope to participate in this event because as you all know, I like blogging about cloth diapers and I love bringing you information about products you should look into buying for your own family.

If you are a blogger and are interested in participating too, please see this post on Midnight Mommy's blog for the most information.

November Stats!

Another month has ended? Time is seriously flying!! I'm starting to finally see my hard work pay off! Lately my daily pageviews are hovering right around 500. Sweet :-)

Google analytic stats for Nov 1 - Dec 1:

Do you like my blog?

I've been building this blog for about 3 months now, and I hope you like it. I've posted pretty much everyday since August about everything from cloth diapering to sleep training to breastfeeding to stay-at-home-mom issues. If you do like my blog, I'd love to hear from you!

Or you can also click below to vote for me on the fence.



If you aren't already following me on facebook or twitter, please consider doing so! Just click the appropriate boxes.

Follow @MommasLetters

Cloth Diapers on Mom Blog Society

Are you guys on Mom Blog Society? I joined just to be able to enter to win a coffee maker and a new lap top (both of ours are on their way out), but have been trying to get involved now. I think it may be a nice way to interact with other momma bloggers.

If you are on it, and blog about cloth diapers, check out the "group" I just created.  http://www.momblogsociety.com/group/cloth-diaper-blogs

I'd love to have more members, seeing as how it's at 1 right now ;-)