Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Letters from Momma's Momma (a guest post by my mom)

While my parents were here, my dad thought it would be fun to write a blog post for me...He just had a lot of random thoughts he wanted to talk about and thought it'd 'help me out' if he did a guest blog since I took so much time away from the computer to be with them. Well, he never ended up writing for me (you still can, dad!)--but it did motivate my mom to write one! She shares her thoughts on visiting us for so long, and being a grandma for the first time. I appreciate her sincerity and ability to share her feelings with me and my readers! I hope that you all enjoy reading what my mom has to say.
Question for the other moms out there to ponder---Have you ever wondered how hard it must be for your mom to get used to you being a mom yourself?? Of course they love having grandkids, but I imagine it must be a very strange feeling when it first happens...to see the one you parented become a parent herself!

1 2 3 generations!
I’ve spent the past several months awaiting my trip to visit my daughter, her husband and my granddaughter.  As the time neared to a week, I became anxious because I’d be leaving my home area for 2 weeks.  I’d never been gone that long and was oddly uncomfortable.  I also spent a lot of time wondering how the trip would go for my daughter and me.  I was so unfamiliar with the grandma role.  My mom died when Kaylene was only 3 months old so I never got to experience any interaction between the two; I had no personal experiences from which to draw.  Honestly, I have spent the last 25 ½ years wondering how the two would have influenced each other - and me.  There were many days I cried out to my mom; asking for her help.  I knew I didn’t want to be the interfering type who constantly complains  “that’s not what I did with you.” , “why are you doing it that way?” or,  “it was good enough for you.”  Two weeks could turn into a long time to spend with someone with whom I hadn’t lived with for seven years.  What would it be like living in HER house for two weeks?  I would be on her turf and not the one in charge.  I prayed to God that things would go smoothly.  I am so thankful that I am getting to experience my child with hers.  I forged onward with packing and driving to my sister’s house (so she could drop me off at the airport).

The flights went smoothly.  I saw Kaylene and G waiting for me at the bottom of the escalator and the adventures began….God knows I prayed for it all to go well.

The house was in perfect order.  Also, Kaylene had gone out of her way to get gluten-free items for me.  I was so impressed with her thoughtfulness with this issue. Bound and determined to keep calm waters, I did my best not to interfere with her ways of doing things. I spent the first few days walking on eggshells.  I didn’t want to put the new-fangled cloth diapers on wrong, put dishes in the wrong place and wake the baby.  It all had to do with me knowing my daughter and not wanting to do the wrong things (you know, like on TV).  Some might say I ‘failed’ because we ended up having an argument.  Communication is a great thing, and things went better after that.  We visited places and hung around the house.  I have to applaud Kaylene on her rare Scrabble victory over me.  I helped her – just a little.
climbing the stairs at Discovery Museum
I witnessed my daughter being the best mom she could be.  I saw some of me in her, and some things I perceived as being better implemented than my time as mom of a small child.  Moms want to do their best raising their children.  We are so happy when we see things go well and mourn when things don’t work out. 
I’ve seen Kaylene graduate through college, get married, be sad and happy.  Little has given me more gratification than to see her interact with her child.   At one point we laid on the bed (Like in the movies) and had a pleasant mother/daughter conversation.  I left after 2 weeks seeing my little girl all grown up with a daughter of her own.  I am so blessed to have that family of 3 (and one on the way) in my life.  And I am so blessed to be able to be there for them when needed and wanted.
Now, all I have to do is lose the new ‘baby fat’ I gained.

--My mom is an amazingly strong woman. She is a third grade teacher and a mother to two daughters. She's been married to my dad for 26 years. She is a big reason why I am who I am today. Love you Mom!


  1. That's so sweet! I honestly haven't thought much about that particular viewpoint, perhaps it's time I did. Thank you for sharing.

  2. This was great! She did a great job! Now you just need an Aunt post ;) just kidding!


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